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Also works for testing grocery store eggs for fertility, and testing science fiction novels to see whether Cathy will like them.

Abby brings this with her when she goes out shopping for lottery tickets, making a show of testing every ticket before she commits to buying it, and then of course giving up, because she can’t find one worth buying. By the end of her shopping trip, everyone in the gas station is staring at her and making weird faces. Abby hopes that she has opened their eyes to the illogic of buying lottery tickets, but of course she’s deluding herself.

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My spellchecker recognizes Eva but not Adolf

I don’t know if there’s any reason to believe Hitler was gay or Jewish. I’ve heard the rumors that he was, but I have no idea how valid they are. Still, I know for sure that saying Hitler was short and dark-haired is an insult to short and dark-haired people.

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