890

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Some birds make better analogies. Like ducks.

It also bothers me that bees going into flowers are always used as a metaphor for sex. It bothers me mainly because pollination IS a sex act, but the ones having sex are the flowers, and the bee is just helping… for which there isn’t really an analogy in human sex, unless you’re talking about artificial insemination.

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889

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Every offer is a limited-time offer, in the great scheme of things.

Eating a food that advertises itself as a limited-time offer is like going on a date with a foreign businessman who will only be in your country for a week.

Except with the foreign businessman, you at least might have the option of moving if you fall deeply enough in love.

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888

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 Here we are, violating every comic-making rule in honor of strip #888.

This is one of those comics where I had trouble deciding which lines to give Abby and which ones to give Norma. The rant in the walls of text is definitely an Abby rant, but the pun in the last panel is an Abby pun, too. Sometimes I think I should be writing Abby and Abby instead of Abby and Norma.

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887

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 I looked for more 'scope'-ending words and found that episcopes are real.

I once told my husband and his friend the following joke:

Extraterrestrials abducted this guy and took him up to their spaceship to do experiments on him. Soon he noticed a strange medical device they were using, and asked what it was.
“It’s sort of the opposite of an endoscope,” they replied. “An endoscope is for looking inside you, and its name comes from the Latin ‘endo’ meaning ‘inside,’ as opposed to ‘exo’ meaning ‘outside,’ or ‘epi’ meaning ‘on the surface.’ This device is for looking at the surface of your skin, and it is called an episcope.”
“But then,” said the guy, “what are you doing using Latin? You’re not Catholics. You’re Episcope Aliens!”

It was a failure. Neither my husband nor his friend understood that “Episcope Aliens” was a pun on “Episcopalians.” And not only that, but instead of asking me to explain the joke, they simply assumed that the joke made no sense, and ridiculed me about it for hours. I suppose this is what I get for being the queen of absurdity in our family.

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882

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It's a... proper adjective?

I’m pretty sure this trick could work in an official Scrabble tournament, if your opponent were careless enough to fall for it. At least, I’m pretty sure there are no official rules regarding the way you pronounce the word when you put it on the board.

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881

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maybe there's some natural law preventing such a planet and building from existing

I asked John and he said that as you approached the speed of light you would just get closer and closer to it but never reach it, even if that meant your acceleration would slow. Apparently the light barrier is a stronger natural law than the speed of acceleration in a vacuum.

Still, hitting the ground at almost the speed of light isn’t much better for you than hitting the ground at light speed or higher.

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