541

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You're out of luck if the guy you want to murder isn't bad-tempered.

Thinking up scenarios involving killing people: creepy and abnormal.

Thinking up scenarios involving killing people, and then writing books about it: creative and intelligent.

Reading books that someone wrote about scenarios involving killing people: normal and well-adjusted.

The world of social expectations is a weird place.

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538

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I'm a pun-guy!

Stating a language rule and then complaining that “everyone gets it wrong” is kind of silly. If everyone really does the opposite of that rule, then the rule is outdated and the more common usage is correct. Abby can be a prescriptivist pedant sometimes.

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535

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 Semantic illicit names.

I’m not sure the cult of Isis is really any better than today’s major religions.

But, you know how some luggage and travel companies make combination locks that use letters instead of numbers? I think Coleman should call theirs the “Coleman Nameloc.” It would be palindromically awesome.

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